In the 18th and 19th centuries, when the British Royal Navy rationed rum to mariners, it wasn’t Bacardi Gold.

This stuff had to be fiery enough to fend off the elements, so to ensure their booze wasn’t being watered down, seamen would perform the gunpowder test by dousing a pile of gunpowder with rum, touching it to a match, and if it still ignited, then the proof was high enough to serve to sailors.

I discovered the moron test last week. Rather than looking up the proof of Booker’s Bourbon from my phone, I dunked a finger into my glass and stuck it into a candle flame on the bar. Sure enough, at 125 proof, I was waving a bright blue blaze to the shock and awe of my friends, and patrons at neighboring tables.

Don’t try this at home, but if you do, keep your hand moving to prevent actually getting burned.

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